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Dr Thomson with an irate party.

Divorce Quips

Here is a selection of divorce related quotes. In humor we reveal unspoken truths...

• I don't miss him, I miss who I thought he was. ~ Unknown
  
  
• I married Mr. Right. I just didn't know his first name was Always.
  (or)
  I married Ms Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. ~ Unknown
  
  
• Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage: he didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
  Lois Misiewicz
  
  
• Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.
  Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it.
  A conversation between Lady Astor and Winston Churchill
  
  
• Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand. ~ Shinichi Suzuki
  
  
• A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short. ~ Mickey Rooney
  
  
• In Hollywood, an equitable divorce settlement means each party getting fifty percent of the publicity. ~ Lauren Bacall
  
  
• Divorce is a game played by lawyers.~ Cary Grant
  
  
• I am a great housekeeper. When I get divorced, I keep the house. ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor
  
  
• Take this marriage thing seriously - it has to last all the way to the divorce.~ Roseanne Barr
  
  
• Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money, and divorce a matter of course. ~ Helen Rowland
  
  
• When two divorced people marry, four people get into bed. ~ Jewish Proverb
  
  
• Divorces are made in heaven. ~ Oscar Wilde

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